So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
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