I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
