Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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