Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
