sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Randomize
