On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
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