so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Randomize
