You work out of a Hotel?
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
