so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Drake has all the answers
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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