There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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