i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
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