A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize