he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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