I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Randomize
