And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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