Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Randomize