I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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