we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
