I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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