Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Randomize
