He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize