That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
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smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
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Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
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