dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
