Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
