So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
