i would punch a child for taco bell
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
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