Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
