HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
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