also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
You need a sexual gate keeper
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
