you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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