Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Randomize
