Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
