I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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