I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Girls should come with a carfax report
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize