ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
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