I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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