You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
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