I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
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