I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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