there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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