Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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