Buhtt sex?
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Randomize
