the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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