So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Naked. naked and bneed help.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
