she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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