help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
