At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"