I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
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