Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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