Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(563): View more from Iowa

My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood

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(908): View more from New Jersey

no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request

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(708): View more from Illinois

A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.

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(518): View more from New York

no really all good couples have similar hair colors!

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27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Read it at the TFLN blog
(858): View more from California

She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.

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(630): View more from Illinois

I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman

(1-630): View more from Illinois

Best superhero ever to exist

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(804): View more from Virginia

Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.

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(604): View more from British Columbia

You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?

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